A Tribute to My Cankles: Wordless Wednesday

Watch at your own risk...

40+ Weeks Pregnant

Lil' J,

Well well well little one. Still baking are we? I hope you're having fun in there but I also hope you realize you're playing in a studio apartment when you have a whole mansion that's yours out here. Don't worry, mommy will till be here to cuddle with you when you come out. I'm not going anywhere!

I will say I'm SO grateful we made it to 40 weeks. SO many babies are born early and for a little bit I really worried you would be one of them! But nope, we made it! We made it full term and... Well, and then some I guess. According to my calculations on when you were conceived you're a little older than we had guessed. But just a day older, so no big deal! Today you're 40 weeks and 4 days. Believe it or not the last four days actually went by quicker than I expected.

I did get a little sad this week when you weren't born on one of several days which I thought would be your birthday. I cried a lot and felt silly for crying. Especially since I know it's just a guesstament. I just really thought that by now we'd be here together and you'd be keeping me up at night. The positive side is your daddy and I have had more time to spend alone together before we become a family of 3 (actually 4 including Snoop).

I've gone through a lot of mood swings since I hit the 40 week mark... The day I thought you would be born. But I'm SO grateful for your daddy who's helped me through them all. He's really the best, you are going to love him so much!

(photo of my big 40+ week belly coming soon!)

I've been analyzing almost every symptom wondering if it means your coming... Diarrhea (gross I know but I hear it's a symptom) loosing my mucus plug, nausea, your slowing movements, every leak, cramp, and contraction I'm wondering if "THIS IS IT."

Last night I had a lot of contractions. I was actually having consistent contractions for about 22 hours. For a couple of hours they were just a few minutes apart lasting over a minute long. But I knew it wasn't time to go yet because they weren't very strong.

When I woke up this morning I still was having some contractions but they were more spaced out, and eventually they fizzled down to nothing. I was sad because I thought we were about to finally meet you. Your dad packed his bag and I went to bed hoping my water would break or something but nope. Not yet.

I've been thinking and praying about this a lot but I've decided Saturday is a good deadline to give you. We're going to talk it over with our doctor tomorrow but I'm pretty sure that's the day we'll schedule to be induced if you're not here yet. I'm a little sad that I may not get to experience the whole timing contractions and rushing to the hospital, but your daddy keeps reminding me that we'll be so happy once you're here, and not to get too caught up in the process. Because really, it's in Heavenly Father's and your little hands! Ours too, but we've just got to enjoy the ride, no matter how it takes us to you.
It's so exciting now to think that I'll be meeting you regardless in less than a week!! Just 5 days! You'll be over 41 weeks then, but for now, you're probably about 7 1/2 pounds and 20in long, though we're predicting you're a little bigger.

Tomorrow we'll check the fluid levels around you and make sure you're still doing ok in there so I can go another week. I'm so happy now, knowing it's not much longer until you're here!

Get here safely little one!

Love,

Mommy

*****

Learn more about being 40 weeks pregnant from Pregnancy Corner.

PS: Please click this link to cast a vote for me! It only takes a second and it'll make my still-very-pregnant self super happy!

TRAPPED!

I feel like a prisoner strapped to a ticking time bomb. I don't know when it will go off but if I leave a certain radius it's sure to set off a trigger and explode--and we'll be screwed.

I've already organized the nursery.
Gotten Snoop's shots, nails trimmed, and fresh bath.
Had the house cleaned (and kept up with it).
Pampered myself with a spa manicure/pedicure.
Got my hair done.
Found a pediatrician.
Packed our hospital bags.

And now I have a sudden urge to do totally irresponsible things that maybe I shouldn't do in my stage of pregnancy:

Walk my dog at 11pm--In the hood.
Pre-purchasing midnight showing of Eclipse tickets, which premiers 5 days past my due date.
Go on a 6 hour trip alone (1.5 hours driving each way and a 3 hour church session in between).
And go on a potentially bumpy boat ride.

I never thought I'd be one of those people itching to have the baby out at the end of a pregnancy. I never understood the difference between a couple of weeks, it's not that much time. And really--This pregnancy has been super easy, and I'm still sleeping well. Yes, sleeping. Which I know I'll be missing soon.

Oh, and I know so many moms are thinking to themselves "enjoy your rest!" I promise I am, I sleep over 8 hours a night only with brief sleepwalking trips to pee. I'm resting A LOT... It's deciding what to do when I'm NOT resting that's driving me nuts.

I've been ready for this baby since I decided to throw out the birth control, I'm just ready to meet her already.

Part of the problem is work. Every day I show up at work at least one person says "You're still pregnant?" No... Actually I just LOOK like I'm still pregnant. I had my baby last week but decided to come back to work. Maybe it SEEMS like I've been pregnant forever, and trust me, I'm ready to be done as much as you're ready to hear I've birthed my baby, but the fact is I haven't even passed my due date.

I have done all of the major things and all that's left are little frou frou things that I can't even get myself to do. If I'm going to be waiting around and want to "relax" and "get my mind off it" then I'd at least like to not feel contained. My OB never told me to stay within a certain time/distance limit of the hospital, however I have a feeling it's a good idea.

I'm doing a story this week with kids on ski boats and if I'm going to report on it I might as well be on the boat! I don't want to stand on the shores burning up just watching! I'm sure it's not DANGEROUS. Though I won't want to be stranded at sea... I'll make sure I can get to shore quickly if need be. There will be ambulance--Convenient in case I need to deliver right there. I'll double check with my OB just to be sure but as long as riding on a boat can't cause brain or shock damage to my unborn child I'll go for it.

One of my readers recently told me she basically set another due date, two weeks after the date her doctor gave her so if the baby arrived before then she'd be happy, and not expecting it before then. Brilliant idea that I wish I had thought of before. But no... I've had June 25th circled, starred, and paper chained to celebrate this special day which she'd arrive on--Or hopefully before. Stupid, stupid me!

I conversed with Dr. Google about due dates with first time moms. According to many sites first time moms average 8 days PAST their due date! How could this be? All of my first time mom friends have gone early! I suppose if 5 out of 10 go late, and 5 friends I know have gone early then I'm bound to be one of the 5 who goes late. No... I can't be one of the less than 5% who has her baby ON her due date because I already know two people like that.

I did also read on one of the sites that women of color tend to go earlier. Who the heck knows why, or if that's even true. That article was written in the 90s.

I can't sit around. It gets SO OLD. And blogging can only entertain me so much. And then when I'm home with my new baby I'll REALLY be at home a lot--Busy with her of course, but talk about cabin fever!

I was talking with a friend at work last week who said she brought her little girl to this thing called "baby day" at a theater in town the last time she was on maternity leave. It's Tuesdays during the day, and the lights are kept up a little so you can feed them and stuff. Plus there's lots of other babies around so no one feels bad for having a crying baby nearby.

I'm not sure if I'll feel up to going out and sitting in a theater with an infant but I'm trying to think of easy outings so I won't go crazy at home. Walks with Snoop... And possibly movies will be the extent of my outings most likely. Granted we are taking trips to see family during my leave too, I guess that'll be enough excitement for a new mom... Which I'm ready to be!

I don't mind waiting for her to make her arrival but I'd at least like to walk on the wild side a little while I wait. Someone stop me from doing something crazy. First, late night strolls in the hood, next stop: Six flags.

Update: I wrote this last night when I was ready to pull my hair out. Youtube has since helped ease my boredom and I've had an epiphany for something more constructive and less destructive I can do while I wait for Lil' J's arrival.--That's to learn this dance before my due date. Wish me luck!

Any other ideas to take my mind off of possibly flying past my due date?

Want to learn the dance with me? I'm using this guy to teach me ;)

And Happy Father's Day to all the dads and Future Daddy's out there!

38 Weeks Pregnant and Getting Closer!

Dear Lil' J,

I must say this week has been one full of MAJOR mood swings for me. One day I'm so ready for you to come out and ready to take over my new "mommy role" then the next moment I'm totally freaking out wondering what I was thinking.

Don't you worry little girl, I've read these feelings are normal, and I'm going to be just fine when we meet, it's just scary thinking that the way I've experienced and seen life, my entire life will be completely different in a matter of weeks.You are getting so close to coming out too, I can tell. I have just been feeling different lately, it's hard to explain, it just feels like things are revving up for your big day. Also... This is a little icky (TMI ALERT!), but the mucus plug that blocks you from the outside world, so to speak, came out today! Yep, I was very surprised to see it. It wasn't what I expected... I pictured one big solid wad of mucus shaped like a cork plug that would go in an over-sized bottle of sparkling cider, but it was nothing like that. It was more like a lot of snot coming out.

(Note to self... Don't show you this letter until you're old enough to appreciate these labor-signs and emotional roller coasters.)

Anyway, I caught you on camera last week, FINALLY rolling around in there. You always stop when I get the camera out so I bought an app for my iPhone so I now have video capabilities! You weren't as rowdy as you can get but I got a little movement here. Don't mind the background noise, I was watching Forensic Files. Look towards my belly button and you can see your elbow or shoulder or something moving around.

This week you're about 6.8 lbs... I'm thinking you may be a little bigger, though I can't picture you being super big just cause it's hard imagining a full-sized baby in there!

Your eye color is either brown, or maybe grayish. I kind of hope they are gray-looking cause then they can change to one of many colors, and I think you would look so cute with your daddy's eyes. That's the first thing I noticed about him!

I'm predicting you'll decide to come out sometime next week, but I'm still hoping you stick around and come on the 23rd... The day your daddy and I met. Although it would also be pretty cool if you arrived on Father's Day. What a nice present for your dad that would be! I wouldn't even have to get him anything else! As long as you come in June (I like that month better than July) we'll be good. But I don't think that'll be a problem.
I wake up every morning wondering if I'm having contractions or if my water broke... Nope and nope. I'm sure I'll know when it's for real, but it's exciting wondering when it'll happen.

I got so much work done at work this week, I finished the 12 extra stories I was trying to get ahead on for maternity leave and now I feel like I'm more relaxed and ready.

Our bags are packed, your daddy and I will put your car seat in hopefully Monday, the same day the cleaners come over and the same day Snoop is getting cleaned up at the groomers. I'm also going to get a nice relaxing manicure and pedicure that day. I already got my hair done this week! So needless to say, I'm on my way to getting fully pampered for the big day!

Don't worry, I'm bringing cute stuff for you to wear too, hats and blankets and bows! I can't wait to dress you up.

Your daddy and I were talking tonight about how we feel about bringing you home. Neither of us are worried about you crying a lot or loosing sleep. I think we just expect it, and are excited for the challenge. Plus, we know it'll all be worth it.

I'm eager to meet you but not in too much of a rush. Something about knowing you'll be here in a few weeks regardless makes me content. We're almost there baby girl! I can't wait to see your beautiful face.

Love,


Mommy

****

PS: Winner of the ExpectNet.com pool (it's free) gets a $25 gift card to Target! It's just for fun, but I'm loving seeing the guesses! Make sure you include your blog url and/or twitter/email in the "how she knows you" section so I can contact you!

****

For more information about being 38 weeks pregnant be sure to check out Pregnancy Corner. Sponsored

Winner of the Baby Time Bag: Commenter #105 Stephanie from A Life Worth Living.
Winner of the Lillebaby Everywear Carrier #38 Stephanie from Houghton Happenings.
Winner of the artwork from Artistic Sensations #55 Emily from Baby Dickey.

Please email babymakingmachine(at)gmail.com with your information and I'll get you in touch with the sponsor. I'll email you sometime this weekend and you'll have 48 hours to respond!

Sad you didn't win a BabyTime bag? The gift code "FUTUREMAMA10"at checkout ill work until the end of the YEAR!

You've DROPPED! (I think)

Dear Lil Miss J,

Like how I have a new nickname for you every week? I like Lil J right now. Spawnie is beginning ot wear off... You seem less and less spawn-like the closer we get to D-day, which believe it or not is in FOUR WEEKS!! At the end of the week we'll be full term and you will be ready to come out at any time! I'd really prefer if you waited a little while longer though. I have some cleaners coming on the 14th and I'm thinking I'll get my hair and nails done on the 15th. Speaking of my nails, they are SO LONG! I need to get them cut so I don't scratch your pretty face. That gives you 10 days... I don't mind if you come after the 15th, you'll be good and big, and I'll be done with important work stuff by then too. Actually, I sort of like the 20s best, so sometime between the 20th and 29th would ROCK! Got that? Jot that on your Wombberry.

I had a dream you were born on the 19th, but it was the 19th today and I was worried about missing work that day... Crazy dream, I can tell you that won't happen in real life, don't you worry!
I know it's a little inconsiderate of me to try to tell you when to come out, I mean, you are in charge, don't you worry, but I just want you to know my preference. I like June better than July so you've gotta come before July! I know statistics show a lot of first-time moms go past their due dates but I don't think that'll be the case with you. I can feel it.. You'll be right around your due date, if not... I think early!

Lil J, this week I've been SO TIRED. I haven't had the energy I use to have! I come home and just want to plop down on the couch, take a nap, and when I finally get the strength I try to work on things for your room, or pack some more in the hospital bag, or work on our labor and just meeting playlists.

I haven't wanted to touch my computer or anything! I've just been to exhausted! I have SO MUCH on my mind that I'd love to write about but I am too tired to put it all down. What have I been thinking about? Well, here's a few topics on my mind lately:

My new quick thoughts on labor
My cure for cankles
Books I've picked out for you
My thoughts on breastfeeding you

One of these days, hopefully soon I'll get them all down while they're fresh in my mind to remember. I hear there's another burst of energy right at the end of my pregnancy and I can't wait for that! I've got some stuff I want to get done! Until then though I'll enjoy my rest, because I'm sure I'll be missing it once you're born.Another sign that means you're getting closer to coming is that I think you've dropped! I woke up this morning and your butt wasn't in my ribs as normal. In fact, all day you've felt lower, and I can tell with the way my belly now rests on my legs that you're lower! So exciting! To make sure I compared this weeks photo to last week's photo and sure enough, you're looking lower! ... And more pointy. A woman at work today guessed you'd be coming next week! ...But you can't come that soon ok?

Some women I know who had due dates close to mine have recently delivered their babies, so it's weird thinking how close we are!
You're still packing on the pounds — at the rate of about an ounce a day. You now weigh almost 6 pounds and are probably more than 18 1/2 inches long. You're shedding most of the downy covering of hair that covered your body as well as the stuff that covered and protected your skin during your nine-month amniotic bath. You're swallowing that stuff, and other secretions, resulting in a blackish mixture, called meconium, that'll form the contents of your first bowel movement. Hopefully you won't have that until you get out!

Keep growing little girl, we are ALMOST there and our lives are about to change FOREVER. I can't wait!

Love,

Mommy

***

Time to take bets (not really) when do you think she'll show up? Early, late? On time? Vote in my poll (top left) and let me know what you chose!

Are you 36 weeks pregnant? Check out Pregnancy Corner for more on how your body and baby are developing- Sponsored.

Winner of the Modern Bird Studio's Giveaway: Random.org says #222, Tanya! Congrats! Email me your address and I'll get you in touch with Modern Bird Studios!

Dear Daughter: I Look Like I Have Elephantitis

Dear LadyBug,

Wow, we've gotten bigger this week. Me especially. I feel myself waddling when I walk and I can't help it. I love penguins, always have, but I don't really enjoy FEELING like one.

I also have a bigger appetite now. I went to Chick-fil-a the other day, and got a meal, then about 15 minutes later I went back to get more fries and the guy in the window was like "You again?" I lied and told him it was for my husband. If only they could have seen my big belly, they wouldn't have asked questions!

You're ALWAYS dancing around in my belly. You are a very very active baby. I've heard that means you'll probably stay that way once you come out. You can see my stomach jump all of the time, last weekend people at work even saw you and all said "WOAH" at the same time when they could see you push up like an alien trying to get out. I still haven't gotten you on video camera yet, and there's only 10 more weeks to catch you!

Just 10 weeks, I can't believe how time has flown! You'll seriously be here before I know it. It's like a crazy world when I go into your room and look around at all of your things... Your bed, your clothes, your dresser and decorations. I've never made a room look so nice in all my life and it's all for you!

I had a little scare this week. One of my feet got REALLY swollen, but I decided not to worry about it unless it hadn't gone down the next morning... It always goes down.

Well, when I woke up my feet were still swollen, especially my right foot so I started to worry. I had a headache and my face was tingling, and I was worried it was swelling up too... All signs of a pregnancy disease called Preeclampsia.

See, your mom is a little paranoid, and basically after I hear about a disease I worry I have it. Your daddy kept telling me I was fine, but I still worried.

I called the nurse at my doctor's office and she said you were probably sitting on one of my veins or arteries wrong and that's why one of my feet was more swollen. I didn't tell her about my headache right away because I wasn't sure if it was really there or if it was paranoia, or if it was just there because I was stressing about having one.

I decided I'd check my blood pressure and if it was high I'd call back. I drove around to several different pharmacies looking for one of those in-house blood pressure machines, and I finally found one at my third stop at a CVS.

It was normal. I calmed down (after leaving your dad a voicemail in tears, which he heard later when I was in a better mood and laughed at me) and I'm feeling better now... Although my feet still look HUGE.

You're still growing well! You should be close to three pounds now, and about 15.7 inches long. Your eyesight is developing more now too.

You're dad and I were debating today what you'll look like. I think you're going to be along the darker shade-spectrum and look more like me, and your dad says you're probably going to look pretty white, though he'd love it if you were my complexion, he doubts that will happen. I guess we'll see soon enough. I'm sure we'll both be surprised, and most likely you'll be something in the middle.

Our baby shower is today! I'm excited to take lots of pictures and see all of our friends! It's my first Saturday off in almost a year, so I'm looking forward to it! You really are one loved little baby!

I was up late making TONS of hairbows (more than 60) for people who donated to March of Dimes on my blog before I found out I was pregnant with you, and luckily I had a couple extra so I stashed a couple for you! Surprisingly they aren't pink! But they're still cute!

I'm finally starting to feel prepared for you so I can relax for the remainder of my pregnancy and just wait for you, it's a nice feeling. There's still so much to do but I have a lot of big things out of the way, which is nice.

I know some people get so eager to get their baby out at the end, and I can't imagine feeling that way yet. I mean, I can imagine being eager and excited to meet you, but for the most part I enjoy being pregnant... Swollen feet and all.

Keep growing little one!

Love,

Mommy

****

Word from a sponsor: Check out more about being 30 weeks pregnant by visiting Pregnancy Corner.

Crazy Cravings (Or Lack Thereof)

In a response to the #1 question men ask me when they find out or see I'm pregnant: "Do you have any weird pregnancy cravings?" I decided to document a few I have... And show my big belly a little.

I read an article about pregnancy cravings on The Bump and it turns out, when I do have an occasional pregnancy craving it actually means my body is lacking some nutrient and telling me I need it. For instance, my craving for a chocolate milkshake could mean I need calcium. My craving for a hearty cheeseburger or a steak could mean I'm low on iron (which I have been craving, and have been low on). I once had my husband bring me a nice big juicy steak while I was at work so I could satisfy my desire.

Sometimes we also just want excuses for eating something extra sweet and chalk it up to a pregnancy craving.

What about you? Did you have cravings?... Or not?

See more of my videos on my Youtube channel.

Wordless Wednesday: I Have Cankles!!- Mr. Linky

...For those of you who didn't believe me.

Share your Wordless Wednesday, link up!

6 Months Down 4 Months to Go!

Dear Baby Girl,

I can't believe it but I'm less than 4 months away from meeting you. I thought I'd let you know in this letter how much you are changing my life already.

I was into writing and spending time online and blogging... Things like that. Now All I want to do is make things for you, and get ready for you to get here. I said I'd never make my own clothes for my child but I've already made you a little dress. I said I wouldn't want to be a stay at home mommy but I'm so looking forward to having three months off from work to get to know you! People tell me once you see your baby you never want to leave their side. That's not hard for me to believe since I already feel so attached to you.

I never thought breastfeeding was a big deal since I wasn't breastfed but since I'm having you I've been reading and watching so much about everything and I definitely want to try to breastfeed for a year!

You're growing a lot, and so am I! My uterus is about the size of a soccer ball now! That's a little hard to believe as I don't feel like I'm THAT big yet. This week I discovered I've developed cankles. They aren't very attractive but somehow I feel like it's a neat sign that you're growing and I'm earning my war scars.I'm so in tune with you now that it's a little scary when I don't feel you for a little while. I've realized though that the more I move around the more you stay put and sleep. You like to kick and move around when I'm resting or trying to sleep.

Your growing steadily, and you've gained about 4 ounces since last week. That puts you at just over a pound! Since you're almost a foot long you are pretty skinny right now. I thought of getting a 3D ultrasound to see your pretty little face but I think we may wait another month or two. But then again at that point we'll only be a few months away from meeting you so I may just wait to see you then.
Your body is filling out proportionally now though and you'll soon start to plump up. Your brain is also growing quickly now, and your taste buds are continuing to develop. Your lungs are developing "branches" of the respiratory "tree" as well as cells that produce surfactant, a substance that will help your air sacs inflate once you hit the outside world. Your skin is still thin and translucent, but that will start to change soon.

I've heard of a few people who have had their babies this young and they survived. You NEED to cook for another 4 months but I'm happy to know that you're getting stronger and stronger.

I also have a really bad shopping problem. I mean... it was bad before I was pregnant. Then I didn't shop for awhile because I wanted to save to spend some money on you and now I can't remember the last time I bought something for myself. And you... You already have 30 DRESSES! (Here's the inventory). Don't worry though, I'd much rather you be wearing cute things than me, and it's much more fun shopping for you.

Keep growing little one so you can fit in your stuff!

Love,

Mommy

***

Find out more about being 24 weeks pregnant from Pregnancy Corner. (Sponsored)

Pregnancy Killed My Bladder

"I wish someone would have told me to stock up on diapers. Not for my baby but for myself. I use to pride myself in my bladder capacity, and strong urinary tract muscles that would help me form ever resorting to using a public restroom. Last week I had the most humbling experience when I was filling up for gas and the urge to pee hit me.

In my pre-preggo days this wouldn’t have been an issue. Once the initial urge hit I could hold it for another hour or two if I had to. These days, the first sign that I need to go pee means I should have relieved myself five minutes ago."

... This is a part of my post today on Project Pregnancy, my new blog on Parenting and Pregnancy Magazine's website! (Yes, I'm very excited about this new gig!). Read the rest here. And if you haven't yet, say hi over there!

****

Baby's First Phone Call Winners: #23 Amy,and #40 Nancy E. J. Congrats!! And email me so I can get you your gift certificates babymakingmachine{at}gmail.com.

Still Alive! At 22 Weeks Pregnant

My dear little LadyBug,

This past week was a pretty difficult week for us. Definitely the most difficult so far. I think part of it is my hormones are magnifying the stress I was already feeling. Then I got sick. I went to the Dr's office to see if you were ok because I just didn't feel right. My stomach hurt and I wasn't sure if I was having contractions. When we went in they checked your heartbeat and you were swimming around, so it was hard for the midwife to keep track, but you were doing just fine! Sure enough it was just a stomach bug and I threw up a bunch. I guess it was payback since I didn't have much morning sickness.

The next day I was really weak because I hadn't been eating anything the day before, but I had to go into work for a couple of hours. It ended up being a scary day later when I passed out at the store. I didn't fall on you or hit my head though, so I was grateful for that. And since then I've been doing SO much better!

I'm trying to get used to having a bigger belly now. I was so excited to have my tummy grow and grow and grow but the bigger I get now, the more I realize it's not the most comfortable predicament. It's nothing to really complain about, but I notice it's harder to get my socks and shoes on, and it takes quite a bit of effort to pick things up on the floor. It's also weird but I feel like I'm always full because my stomach is so stretched out. Now's the time I need to remember that stretch mark cream!

My back also hurts a little more now that my weight is shifting. I know I need to improve my posture, and I think prenatal yoga will help too. I'm just a little worried to think about how it's going to get over the next several months! ... I try not to think about it too much right now.

On to the good news now...
Your daddy says he'll help me put my socks and shoes on when I can't do it anymore. You have a really good dad. Just wait until you meet him! In the mornings when we wake up, and at night when I come home he rubs on my belly and tries to feel you kicking. You've been kicking a lot harder this week, I even noticed you kicking hard enough so I could see my skin bounce up! I put a cell phone over you on my stomach and you kicked it off! I tried to get it on video tape but you of course, stopped just in time.

I love feeling you move around in there. Sometimes if I think too hard about it it seems strange, but it's really comforting knowing you're ok!

Oh my goodness Babydoll, I got the CUTEST outfits for you this week. I've stopped shopping for awhile now but I have over 20 dresses for you already ranging up to 1 yr old. So don't you worry girl, you're going to be STYLING!

I also just learned how to make you tutus and now I'm OBSESSED! I've decided I'm going to make you tutus to match Snoop (that's your dog)'s dog collars, and we're all going to go out on walks together and trips to Petsmart and MATCH! I'm excited because it gives me an excuse to stop ignoring Snoop and make him some new stuff too! I think I've spent a little bit too much money on tulle for the tutus this week, but at least I know you'll have one for every season.

I'm also making good progress on your mobile. I think I'll be finishing it this week! I'm a little worried because I have so many ideas for your room and so many things I'm already planning to put in there, I wonder how it'll all come together. I'm not a good decorator, and I'm sure you won't mind either way but I really want it to be pretty for you!

I started reading books to you this week. I read you two Dr. Seuss books I liked from when I was a kid. I'm hoping to keep the tradition up, and read to you every night after you're born! I want you to love books like your mommy does!

(photo courtesy of BabyCenter)

I couldn't believe how big you look now when I look at this picture for this week. You're about 11 inches and almost 1 pound.

You're starting to look like a miniature newborn. Your lips, eyelids, and eyebrows are becoming more distinct, and you're even developing tiny tooth buds beneath his gums. Your eyes have formed, but your irises don't have color yet. When they do I wonder what color they'll be! I have dark brown eyes and your daddy has blue eyes. Inside your belly, your pancreas — essential for the production of some important hormones — is developing steadily.
I get to see you today for another ultrasound to check on your face and umbilical cord so hopefully I'll see how long and big you are too! I'm excited and hoping you're in a better position for pictures this time because I want to update the photo on my desk and another frame we have at home. I'm a little sad because this will be the first appointment your daddy can't come to (he has to work). So it'll be just you and me. You'll have to behave and pose pretty for pictures so I can show your daddy when we get home!

I love you baby girl. Keep growing strong!


Love,

Mommy

****

Word from a Sponsor: To get a more in-depth look at being 22 weeks pregnant be sure to visit Pregnancy Corner!

Something's Gotta Give

My hands trembled as I dialed my husband's number as quickly as I could. This was the first of two times I'd do this in a span of 24 hours. I did my best to hold back my tears and choke back sobs and when he answered the phone I let it out.

I felt like I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. The event that was the straw the broke this camels back isn't that important, in fact, I hardly remember the specifics. I just knew that I felt like I had so much weight on my shoulders coming from every angle. The stress was getting to be unbearable but it would be nearly detrimental to show weakness among my peers.

Before I ever started college I told myself I'd find a way to get all of my tuition paid for. After much research and many many scholarship applications I was able to more than do so.

Before we decided to get pregnant, I told myself I'd find a way to save enough money, aside from my normal day job, to cover the money I'd be short during my maternity leave. So far I've been able to do that, but it means working on my days off. It means working when I get home, after my long 10+ hour a day shift at work. It means networking my butt off, and losing sleep. This week, the effects hit me hard.

Migraines, restlessness, and a cramping scare that sent me to the OBs office to check and see if I was dilating prematurely. Luckily I was not, my cervix was closed and just fine, and baby girl's heartbeat was strong and normal, and based on her level of movement, she seemed to be doing great. But my already low immune system was down for the count, and caught a terrible stomach bug that's going around. The midwife told me to rest and drink lots of fluids, but to call again if I started throwing up or couldn't keep any liquids down.

That diagnosis was confirmed a couple short hours later when I upchucked my lunch... And was just 10 seconds shy if it landing on my boss instead of in the porcelain god. I laid on the floor in the bathroom (gross I know) and kept my head on the toilet between heaves, all the while praying no one would walk in.

I didn't have much morning sickness, and being well into my second trimester I assumed I was mostly past that phase. I debated working through it at work, but I gave it another half hour and had to leave.

When I got home I noticed my husband had left five packages for me on the kitchen table (my eBay winnings) usually when I get home and see these the first thing I do is run to grab the scissors and tear the packages open like it's Christmas morning. But all I had the strength to do this time was grab the boxes and carry them upstairs and lay them next to me in bed. I curled up with my bottle of water and tried to sleep.

My husband called a few times to check on me and realized how sick I was when I told him I hadn't opened my packages yet. He decided to skip basketball and come home to take care of me.

I couldn't stop throwing up. Even a sip of water would send me to the bathroom. I was scared to eat. Scared to drink. Scared I would get dehydrated and send myself into preterm labor (yes, I'm a nutcase, but I know it can happen). I paged the on-call nurse and wondered if she'd tell me to go to the ER to get IV fluids. Turns out it can take awhile for you to get that dehydrated. She told me to drink smaller sips and call in the morning if I was still throwing up.

Sadly, more than my fear of ending up in the ER was my fear of missing work the next day. I knew I already had a story assigned that people had taken time to arrange, I felt guilty knowing that I may have to cancel it all, and wondered what they'd think of my absence. I sent an email warning a few people of my condition, but hoped I'd feel well enough to at least go in for part of the day.

Today, I woke up able to keep liquids down. I was still feeling nauseous but didn't think I'd throw up, so I decided to go in for a few hours. I'm sure to everyone around me I looked perfectly fine but inside I felt like I was dying.

Trying my best to put on a serious face I survived my three hours of work and checked out after my interviews. On my way home I told my husband I was stopping off at the grocery store to get ginger ale and fruit. When I got out of the car and walked into the store I knew I had to make it quick. My head was light and my legs were weak.

I skipped looking for a cart and grabbed a hand basket... A mistake. I hurried down the drink isle and grabbed apple juice and a six pack of ginger ale. I rushed over to the produce section to grab a container of fruit. A man down the isle asked if I wanted to try a free sample of something and I tried to squeak out something like "no thank you" but I knew the clock was ticking.

I've fainted before so I know the signs when it's getting close. Having no shame I knelt next to the fruit while I thought about which one I wanted and how I'd execute my exit strategy.

I made my decision, chose the fruit with the biggest variety... Also the heaviest... Another mistake, and b-lined it for the check out lane.

Literally having to stop and kneel several times along the way. I began to worry how I'd make it out of there. The first time I fainted--pre-pregnancy I left the building on a stretcher. I didn't want that today.

I walked with haste, dropping the fruit container a couple of times, but finally made it to the register where I knelt again. I prayed the woman ahead of me would take her time paying and that the woman behind me would stop looking at me like I was crazy.

The man at the register was too good at his job and must have rung in my items in record time. I stood up to pay and only focused on one thing... "Staying conscious."

I swiped my card, entered my pin, and stabbed the "enter" key like a mad woman. But then I knew my time was up and I was going down. The last thing I remember was grabbing the unstable counter and saying "I'm sorry, I'm going to pass out."

Thank God when I fainted this time, I didn't hit my head, or land on my stomach or really fall forward or backwards. I think I had barely enough consciousness to collapse on my knees while I waited for my sight and hearing to return. This was the third time this has happened since being pregnant. The other two times I was out for interviews at work and had to apologize as I knelt down on the ground as I was blacked out. I chalked it up to being newly pregnant and my body adjusting to changes. But this time in the grocery store was the worse case so far, and the scariest time since I'm much further along than before.

I was still shaking when a woman from another register came over and asked if she could get me a chair. A manager asked if he could bring me some water and I told him I just needed to sit. I didn't chance it, and called my husband to come get me, hands trembling as I dialed his number like the day before. We only live a few blocks away from the grocery store so he ran, literally, over to come get me and drive me home.

This afternoon as I've sat and pondered about everything I'm going through, my body changes, demands at work, demands dealing with getting ready for the baby, I've decided I need to reorganize a few things.

Recently I decided to take on another opportunity but I realized that adding it on to everything I'm already doing would be absolutely ridiculous, and I really need to give something up in return. Obviously I can't really do much about my day job, but I will be more conscious about over exerting myself and be less afraid to speak up when I know I'm not feeling well. I've been scared to be judged or seen as a "drama queen" but I've come to see that my, and my baby's health is more important than peer perception.

Next, I'm no longer going to be doing my MomTV Show every-other week. For now, I'm changing my show to once a month until I feel like I can handle more. I initially started it every-other week because I knew every week would be too much to add to my plate, but it's the least "profitable" out of all of my extra curricular duties and the one easiest to cut down on.

Also, I'm keeping my full term of giveaways going but I'm not filling the unassigned spots, and I'm asking my sponsors to be understanding if it takes me an extra week to get their feature up.

I also think I'm going to cut back on babysitting in another month or so. I LOVE the kids I watch, but not having a full day off to rest and recuperate is killing me (yes, I understand this is what moms go through on a daily basis, but I think I should try to enjoy my non-mom status as long as possible). Luckily my husband can help in the babysitting department and take over most of my duties if need be.

Unfortunately, another thing on the chopping block has gotta be blog stalking. I've already cut back on commenting because of time, and I hate myself for it. I loved the days when I could spend hours surfing the web after work on my weekends, and reading the blogs of all of my readers, finding new blog to read, and making new friends. With this baby coming and planning for her it's sucking away a lot of my extra time and energy... Even my search for a doula has caused me several migraines... But that's another post entirely.

I love what I do... Everything I do, but something's gotta give, and I'd prefer it's not my legs out from under me.

20 Weeks Down 20 Weeks to Go!

Dear Spawnie,

We've made it! Can you believe it? We are to our half-way point! Not only that, but this week I found out you're my baby GIRL! I can't believe it. Partly because all of the tests seemed to think you were a boy and partly because it just seems to good to be true! I know boys aren't that bad but girls are just so much fun! I told myself if you were in fact a girl then I'd be in for it, cause you're one to go against the grain already. But you know what... That's a lot like your mommy!

Let me tell you something little girl... I want you to know you can be WHATEVER you want to be! You can be a doctor, a lawyer, a firefighter, a teacher, and you can be a mom too! As you're growing up you'll see all sorts of moms and women who do all sorts of things! I want you to know you can go for whatever you dream! I did, and I'm so happy I did. Especially since I'm finally going for my biggest dream, and that's to have you!When we went in this week for our ultrasound I was SO surprised to see you were a girl. Finding that out really made me the happiest mommy alive! It also makes all of this seem so much more real!

Your daddy bought you a dress that day and I got you one the next day. People tell us not to buy too many clothes and to stock up on things like diapers but it's so hard when dresses are the fun things. I'm not sure I'll ever buy you a pair of pants!

When we got your measurements you were looking nice and healthy! You kicked me quite a bit during the ultrasound too! I could see it and feel it at the same time! You were upside down, it didn't look very comfortable, you were really standing on your head! I was worried at first because your pictures didn't look like other pictures I've seen where they can clearly make out all of the body parts. At first it looked like you didn't have any arms! But you aren't armless! The tech pointed out your arms to us!
You look like you're weighing about 10 1/2 ounces now. You should be about 6 1/2 inches long now, or about the length of a banana. I can't remember what you measured to exactly during the ultrasound.

You're swallowing more now, which apparently is good for your digestive system.

There were a couple of things the doctor talked to us about concerning you. Number one, mommy is five months pregnant now and I've only gained about 3 pounds! You wouldn't think it looking at this picture though. You can even see my belly button sticking out through my shirt!

I don't get a lot of time to eat during the week when I'm working hard so I'm going to make a conscious effort to eat more this week. We also couldn't see the front of your face because of the way you were positioned so we'll be doing another ultrasound in three weeks to make sure you're looking nice and healthy there too... I'm sure you are! We also have to get more pictures of your umbilical cord.I'm already beginning to shop for you! I ordered you a princess book, and some other story books. I also got some butterflies to decorate your room with, and I'm looking for your crib bedding now! I can't wait to meet you my little daughter... Oh. And we decided on your name! I hope we don't change it, I like it! But I'm not telling anyone yet. I will tell you though that you and I will have the same initials! J.L.!

Love you baby girl, keep growing strong!

Love,

Mommy

****

Question of the day: Did you ultrasound pictures confuse you too or did your baby look more like a baby at 20 weeks?

A word from a sponsor: For more in depth information about being 20 weeks pregnant check out Pregnancy Corner.

Oh, and looking for a nursing bra? My friend wants you to know about a good deal on nursing bras.

18 Weeks Pregnant: I Can't Believe It

Dear Spawnie,

You are more than 18 weeks along now. It's really crazy how big you're getting and how quickly this is all going along. We're almost HALF WAY there!! Can you believe it?! I can feel you every day now. I really love it, sometimes you kick harder and longer than other times... Like when I'm at work and reading the news. I'm not sure if you really hate my voice or really like it but you kick a lot when I'm doing that. I laugh to myself when I think about what you must be thinking.

I can't help but wonder if you're strong cause of the vitamins I'm taking. I've been taking them since before I was pregnant with you so I could get my body to stock up on the goods for you. Maybe that's why I can feel you so much already.

Monday your daddy and I find out if you're our son or our daughter. We're very excited to know... Especially me. I can't wait to go out and buy you a little sporty outfit, or a dress. I think I'll go straight to the store after we find out to celebrate.

I already feel a little bad for your siblings after you. I'm so excited and I love you so much already I just feel like you feel complete our family! I hear the first pregnancy is the most exciting. It's hard to imagine being this excited every time. Don't tell your future brother or sisters how excited I am about you ok? They may get jealous!

You are on my mind ALL of the time now! I think about what you're doing, how you're feeling, what I've been feeding you, what you'll look like, how big you're getting, if you'll get here ok... It never ends! I'm just SO EXCITED to meet you and hug you and kiss you, and I can't believe you're actually MINE! It's really crazy to think about it. I love your daddy a lot and it's so cool thinking about you being exactly one half of me and one half your daddy. I hope you get his good looks.

Spawnie, I'm getting huge! I guess that means you are too, but more on that in a moment.

We already have plans for the three of us! Next year, when you're over a year old we want to take you to a football game... BYU vs UT. It's gonna be AWESOME. And we'll get you all dressed up in BYU gear. You need to watch the game if you're going to play it (assuming you're a boy).

You're about 5 inches long now, and you're flexing your joints more, you're also forming this weird skin stuff around you this week to keep you from getting all wrinkly while you're floating around in there.

You're making mommy have to go to the bathroom a lot, and I've been very faint when standing for a long time... I've blacked out twice at work in the past few weeks... But that's another story. The doctors say we're ok, I just need to drink more water and sit down when I feel the symptoms coming on. (Photo from Baby Center)

You're also taking up a lot more space in my stomach now. Last night my stomach was hurting REALLY BAD and I wasn't sure if it was because I was having Braxton Hicks contractions or if you've just pushed my stomach way up to my chest and it was hurting from all of the moving. When I took a picture of my stomach this week I noticed my bump got more stretched out, and it looks like I'm carrying you higher now. According to the wives tales that means you're a girl! We shall see in just 5 days!

I love you Spawnie, keep on growing strong!

Love,

Mommy

***

A word from a sponsor: Learn more about being 18 weeks pregnant from Pregnancy Corner.

Question of the day: Did you feel like your stomach was squished up into your ribs? What did Braxton Hicks contractions feel like ot you and when did you get them?

My Pregnancy Checklist and Finally Nesting!

I'm a list person... Big time. I like lists so much I will write something on my list that I've already done just so I can check it off and feel more accomplished. My problem is I usually forget where I put them. My checklist are best kept in my binders or on my computer somewhere, though I usually like having them in my purse.

When I first found out I was pregnant (and it was still a secret) I used The Bump's website to figure out what kinds of things I should be doing... When should I set up my appointment, what should I be doing differently. I started using their checklist and have been a little bit of a slacker lately but I went in today to see how I'm doing and where I left off.

We decided not to do the genetic testing stuff so I crossed those off my list today too. It's so weird because at 18 weeks I still feel like I'm just starting, but when I stop and think that I'm almost halfway there I can't believe it! If the second half goes as fast as the first half this baby is gonna be here in no time!!

I've done most everything on my list up to where I'm suppose to be. I've been having my regular OB visits, exercising (for the most part) and preparing here and there. But am I really getting to the point already where I need to start looking for a pediatrician? Signing up for birthing classes? HOLY COW!
Granted I'm still looking a few weeks out, technically that's a month away... But still! I get so excited seeing upcoming things to plan such as maternity photos (I'm soooo getting them done, and if you've had some done I'd LOVE to see them cause I want to have an idea of a theme to go for).

Most of the stuff in the upcoming weeks of my list looks like the fun stuff. Notice my extra excitement for one particular item below:
Yep! It's finally beginning to kick in... The "nesting" mode. I'm turning our guest room into the nursery and I'm SO EXCITED! We find out in a week if Spawnie is a boy or a girl and then I plan to GO CRAZY! I will need a clean slate to start with and that means a clean room. I would put up a before picture of it now so you could get an idea but if you know me you know I'm messy so I won't embarrass myself for those who still picture me as the organizational queen.

I told my husband a few weeks ago that soon my "nesting mode" would kick in and I'd want to clean and organize our house. The conversation went something like this:
Husband: *Silence*
Me: "What?"
Husband: *Laughs*
Me: "What?"
Husband: "I'm sorry but I just can't picture that happening to you."
Me: "No, it's going to happen, it's my instincts. I'll just want to clean and stuff."
Husband: "Yea right, I'll believe it when I see it."

If you know us you know that he does most of the cleaning, the laundry, the dishes and things of that sort, and you'd understand why that conversation went the way it did. But now as my friend Heidi put it, it's a battle of my motherly instincts vs my messy personality.

Last night I told my husband that I wanted to organize the room today and tomorrow (my weekend) and he just gave me the same blank stare... He still doesn't believe me. And granted I'm writing this post out rather than organizing right now but hey... I have the rest of the day!

I know once we find out what Spawnie is I'm going to want to shop and I want to have a clean slate in this room to have a place for everything. So wish me luck my friends! I have 21 weeks and 4 days left if Spawnie comes on time, and today's task... Turning the room from guest room/storage room to a baby room in the making!!

***

Questions of the day:

When do you think is the best time to have a baby shower?

When do you think is the best time for maternity photos? Have yours? Link them please!

***

$145 Fertility Package Winner according to random.org: #14 The Honey B. Congrats! Email me your address to babymakingmachine(at)gmail.com

You're 17 Weeks and Gave Us a Big Surprise!

Dear Spawnie,

This week, without a doubt I know you are one strong little cookie. I wasn't so sure about your kicks before and people joked it could have been gas but this week I know without a doubt that I feel you kicking... A lot! It's really quite surprising to me actually. You’re kicking right now as I write this out. I say kicking but I guess technically it could be you flinching/ spazing out.

Last week I asked a few people how early they could feel you from the outside and most seemed to say sometime in the 20th weeks. One friend said her husband could listen and hear her baby move before then so I told your daddy to try to listen for you. He couldn’t hear anything but between you and me I don’t think he was trying very hard... And I don’t think he has such good hearing.
A few nights later though I felt you moving and I put my hand over you to see if I could feel you on the outside. To my surprise I could! So I went over to your daddy and had him keep his hand there cause I knew you’d move again and I wanted him to feel it. Once I felt you kick I looked over at your daddy and I saw his face light up. I knew he felt you, his face said it all. He said he did feel you and that it was crazy thinking that you’re actually in there moving around.

Since I'm only 17 weeks along it makes me wonder who big you are in there. I've told you before your dad was 10lbs 2 oz so it makes me think that maybe you'll be bigger than normal. Or perhaps you're just stronger which I think will help you win the Heisman... hehe. Kidding kidding!

I had a root beer the other night and you started moving around like crazy! I hadn’t had much carbonation since being pregnant so I think it was new for you. I am excited to feel you more and more as we get bigger and bigger!

This week your skeleton is changing soft cartilage to bone, and your umbilical cord is growing stronger and thicker. You weigh about 5 ounces now… About as much as a turnip, and you’re around 5 inches long from head to bottom. You can move your joints, and your sweat glands are starting to develop.Mommy can’t sleep as comfortably anymore. If I try to sleep on my stomach I feel a little queezy, probably because I’m squishing you. If I lay on my sides my hips hurt, I think cause the weight of you pulls me more forward. I’m using a pillow between my knees for now to help but I’m getting a nicer one soon! Don’t worry though; my lack of sleep is totally worth it for you!

I can’t believe we’re almost half way there and get this… Just 12 days until I know if you’re a boy or a girl! I really hope you cooperate for the cameras cause I don’t want to leave until I see what you are!
I really don’t mind either way. If I were to guess based on mommy’s instincts I’d say you’re a girl, but based on all of the tests I’ve taken I’m thinking you’re a boy. Obviously it’s one or the other! I’m just so excited to know so I can start shopping for you. Call me picky but the unisex outfits just aren’t as fun or cute to me. I do have little outfits in mind for you already though on way or another don’t you worry! You’ll be a very stylish baby!

Keep cooking Spawnie, I can’t wait to meet you!

Love,

Mommy

****

A word from my sponsor: To learn more about being 17 weeks pregnant visit Pregnancy Corner.

We've Got 15 Weeks Down!

Dear Spawnie,

I have such exciting news to report this week. Babycenter tells me you now measure about 4 inches long, crown to rump, and weighs about 2 1/2 ounces... About the size of an apple, and APPLE! Can you believe it?!

You're already busy moving amniotic fluid through your nose and upper respiratory tract, which is helping the air sacs in your lungs develop. Your legs are growing longer than your arms now, and you can move all of your joints and limbs.

Although your eyelids are still fused shut, you can now sense light! Apparently if I were to shine a flashlight at my tummy, you'd be likely to move away from the beam. Don't worry though, I won't torture you with that... Maybe not until you start kicking my ribs.

If we did an ultrasound this week I'd probably be able to see what you are... Boy or girl that is, but sadly I won't know for four more weeks. I know you know but to me, this is torture not knowing. So far all of the tests are telling my boy, so I'm pretty much convinced you're a boy, but your daddy still thinks you're a girl.

As far as your mommy goes, I've been gaining some weight. We go in for another appointment to hear your little heartbeat on Monday so I'll also get weighed then and see how much I've gained. Last month I had gone down, and back to my origional weight, but this month I'm sure I've gained... Maybe even 5 pounds! We'll see.I've had a stuffy nose and cold this week but I guess... Like everything else, that can be seen as a pregnancy symptom too. Another crazy thing that happened this week... You kicked my belly button out!! Just look! I can't believe it. I hear it only gets bigger as my tummy does. Your daddy is already making "outtie" jokes. You're going to have to poop on him or something later to get him back for me.
Your daddy and I decided not to get the tests done to see if you may have any genetic problems. We decided we'd love you either way, but we're sure you're perfectly healthy.

I have a lot more energy lately and the biggest news of the week... I felt you move around!! It was New Years Eve, and you were about 15 weeks old exactly and you felt like a slow moving bubble in my stomach. I felt you then, two days ago while we were riding in the car, and last night. I think you're a night owl like mommy. I can't wait until I feel you every day, and when your daddy can feel you too.

Sleep well little baby, and grow strong. We're doing our best to get ready for you and we're really excited to meet you!

Love,

Mommy

****

For more in depth information on being 15 Weeks Pregnant visit PregnancyCorner.com- Sponsored by Pregnancy Corner.

Questions of the day:
1. Did your bellybutton pop out during pregnancy? Did it go back in after?
2. Which one of these baby monitors should I get? Please vote for your favorite, the one with the most votes, I can win!

My Dog SO Knows I'm Pregnant

There were a few clues that made me think I was pregnant before I knew for sure... My strange cravings for breakfast tacos at 11 o'clock at night several days in a row. My unusual urge to pee in the middle of the night. And my lack of some "time of the month" symptoms. But one little nudge I didn't expect was the constant cold, wet one between my legs by my dog Snoop.
Yea, I know dogs sniffing people in the butt or crotch-region isn't anything unusual for many people who are around dogs a lot, but this generally isn't like Snoop. I racked my brain to remember where I had been through the day... Around other animals? Good-tasting food? What the heck was he sniffing?

His weird tendencies continued. He got a hold of my underwear.. And would chew out the very-important crotch area... What? Thanks a lot Snoop! I have to drive a hour and a half to get these (I know some of you know what I mean)! Thanks pup, but if I wanted crotchless panties I would have gone to Fredericks of Hollywood!

He literally ruined 5 pairs of underwear, and he's NEVER done this before... Oh, and he has never chewed up any kind of clothing before. It did made me feel a little better when I found a pair of my husband's underwear chewed up too earlier this week, but I still don't get it. Clean, dirty, he didn't seem to mind. But he'd find the hamper, his victim and chew it up.Then he started acting weird around me... While calm, he'll look at me and whine and ALWAYS have to be near me. He follows me around everywhere and sits as close to me as he can. He use to follow either me or my husband around, but now it's always me. There have been a few times that I've been watching TV and he'll come over, pace back and forth in front of me then actually jump on my lap... And this is a 50 pound dog we're talking about. He'll move slightly to my side then put his face on my lap.

At night he usually sat on the foot of the bed, to the side so he wasn't in either of our way. Now, he tries to lay near my stomach, or on top of my legs. It was cute at first, but now it's pretty annoying. I yell at him and kick him to move... Mean, I know but you can't mess with a preggo's sleep!

I've read on a few sites that animals, particularly dogs can sense when their owner is pregnant. They can get more protective, more attached, and just act weird. Sometimes it's because they notice their owners are are more sleepy, and or sick, they are getting less attention... And later, when you're bigger, because you're changing shape and walking weird.

Snoop, being part Shar-pei and I think Shepherd mix, has always been pretty protective, but now when we're on a walk he's extra alert of people walking buy us. He always runs to the door side-window when someone walks by or knocks on the door, he's keeping an eye (and ear) out.

We watched a two-month-old for a few early hours on Black Friday. I slept downstairs with the baby in the bassinet, Snoop stayed with us, and was curious, yet calm and gentle around her.
I think Snoop will be a great big brother/ pet to little Spawnie. He already seems to be taking an interest.

Did your pets know you were pregnant? Or is Snoop just as weird as I am?

... And Then I Cried

I told you I kept a journal from the day I got my BFP, here's a scary experience I wrote about the day after my good news.

Written 10/17 but saved for today

Last night, after finding out I was pregnant I went to the bathroom (Again! I was going a lot that day). When I examined the toilet paper I noticed some brown spotting. 'Implantation bleeding' I thought to myself. I asked one of my friends on Twitter about it and she said that could be it... Or it could be my body "trying to start."

Shoot. I was still a day away from my period starting. What if my body was going to reject this forming baby?

And with that... I lost it.

I tried to hide my fears and sadness but I couldn't. I'm not a good actor, and the love of my life can always tell when I'm upset.

Tears kept streaming down my face, and the conversations that took place after that moment made me realize this was something we both wanted more than we knew.

That night I made a promise to God.

The False Symptoms

The past few days I haven't had much time to really think about blogging... I mean really, if you couldn't tell, yesterday my post was kind of like "Wahm bam, thank you ma'am" I didn't feel like adding more than my raw journal entry, and that's what we got. To be honest, my eyes were drooping and my head nodding off by the time I hit "publish."

When I woke up this morning I read it over again, praying I didn't have spelling mistakes. I didn't, just a sentence left half-written: "I almost bought a First Response early detection test but."

....Yea, that's how I left it. Oh dear. Yes, I've completed the sentence now in case you want to re-read the post.--I know you were dying to know the rest of that thought.

Oh well, that's how it gets sometimes right?

I'm not going to lie, it has to do with the fact that I can't stay up past 10 lately. In fact, I just woke up from a 3-hour nap. Part of the cause could be because my husband was watching golf--Perfect napping television... Or the fact that our couch is very comfortable... But every day this week?

I know chronic sleepiness is a pregnancy symptom, and I'm not implying that I'm pregnant, but instead wondering if it's possible that when that time comes, these non-symptoms will intensify with the real symptoms.

For example... I get random cravings. I guess it's normal for every woman every now and then to want a taste of chocolate RIGHT NOW...But sending my husband out for a late night run for hot dogs and donuts doesn't sound like the "Average-Jane" situation to me... Or does it? What about oranges and funnel cake? Tacos and chocolate-covered strawberries? Fried chicken and watermelon... (Ok, maybe the last one isn't so weird).

All of these random combinations are things I have craved recently and felt like I must eat it right then! It would be nice to at least have the excuse of pregnancy to want such things at such random times but I don't.--And it only makes me worry my hungers will get weirder and intensify when I am pregnant.

And what about my sleepiness and strange intense dreams? Will getting pregnant automatically throw me into the realms of dreamless narcolepsy?

...Or perhaps I'll get lucky and everything will turn around like the Mad Hatter table in Alice in Wonderland where all reason and logic--Normal things, are backwards--Once I'm pregnant I'll never be sleepy and I'll eat normal things.. Healthy things. Oh how that would be nice.

Did you have crazy cravings before you were even pregnant? Did they go away after you were? How about sleepiness? Am I crazy?

****

The winners of the Baby Shower Gift Set and $15 gift certificate to Oh Baby Boutique giveaway by Josie from Raising Baby Cheap are:
Gift Set: #12: The Royal Family
Gift Certificate: #17 Destiny
Contact me with your info at babymakingmachine (at) gmail (dot) com.
Also don't forget about my tile necklace giveaway that ends Monday night!