Choosing Someone to Catch the Baby from My Vajayjay

Try visiting your girlie doctor... Being told your insurance doesn't cover the procedure, arguing with them, and calling the insurance company yourself to find out in in fact DOES. Putting your insurance company on the phone with them, they finally agree, but say that you need to pay your $150 deductible.. And that needs to be paid up front (as if they assume you'll run away after in your attempt to evade the GYN bill monster). Then, you wait... And you're called into a little room. Then you wait, and wait, and wait... And Tweet about the long wait.. And consider pulling the dang cord out yourself... You start to consider leaving.... Getting up to put your clothes on. And as if on cue... A knock at the door.

Your doctor comes in, puts your legs in the stirrups, pulls the goalie, and asks if you need another method of birth control prescribed. You tell her you're thinking of using natural prevention measures for now, and she sort of says somethings like "cool" and is outta there like a fat kid in dodgeball! It all happens before you could say your ABCs and you wonder "WTF?"

This was my last experience at my GYN, and I'm not gonna lie, I felt a little violated. I felt rushed, unimportant, and a little like a cow... Or cattle, whatever--It didn't feel good!

She is an OBGYN, but needless to say, I don't want HER delivering my future baby! So... Now I'm faced with the quest of finding a new "female doctor."

I might as well just find an OBGYN, so I can go to the same person pre-and during pregnancy. But get this.. I'm SUPER picky. Ok not really normally, but I kind of want to be for this.

Have you seen Knocked Up? Not the best movie, but there's a scene where the pregnant lady goes to like 10 different doctors and has them give her 10 different ultrasounds and based on their personality, skills, and connection she chooses the doctor she likes best. That's a little how I imagine myself... But I'd rather get the interviews done early.

I've watched one too many episodes of A Baby Story where the mom-to-be is given a time limit for dilating, then they take her to the operation room to be cut open, just cause "it's taking too long." No thank you!

Nothing against C-sections or whatever, but I definitely don't want one if I don't absolutely NEED one. I mean, although it's not the prettiest sight, I'd much rather just get the thing to come out of my Hooha... But it's not even that, bottom line... I want whats best for me and baby, but without feeling rushed, or pushed into anything. NOTHING against anyone who has c-sections, I just want to try to get baby out of my lady parts first if possible.

How did you choose your doctor? My last GYN was referred by a friend. Although it didn't go well, my family doctor was also referred by a friend and he is WONDERFUL. He took the time to talk to me and my husband, answer all of our questions, joke with us. I didn't feel rushed at all. He did give me some recommendations of OBs, so I'll look into that.

So my question is, how do I choose a new OBGYN?... And/or perhaps a Midwife or Doula? I don't want to wait until I'm pregnant to choose one. I'd like to have one in mind before so I know who to call when I'm like "Hey, I'm pregnant, when can I come in?"

My friend Kayce is a midwife assistant and doula in training and I'm ALWAYS asking her questions about labor, delivery, pregnancy, etc. She has a great post with questions to ask a potential doctor/midwife/doula.

*Added* Can I "interview" a midwife before I'm pregnant, or would that be weird? Don't most OBs have midwives too? Do doula's deliver babies alone? If I do interview an OB or Midwife do I pay a copay, does it count as a "visit" like that, or can I do it over the phone? Do they actually schedule time for those things?**

Anything else you can think to add? What should I watch out for? Be aware of? How did you choose yours? Are there good doctor review websites you like? Feed me!!

Thanks!

PS: My BFN story here.

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PS: Winner of my JOHNSON'S gift basket giveaway: #39 Mrs. Priss who said: "Glad you're feeling better. I'm a follower" Congrats! email me your address babymakingmachine{at}gmail.com

The Physicals

I set up appointments to get physicals more than a month ago. I'm not a huge fan of doctor's offices and I consider myself very lucky to have a nurse for a mother-in-law. I usually call her with all of my medical questions, and to make sure I'm not dying.

As a part of this list of things to do 6 months to a year before baby makin' I decided to go ahead and at least do this.

We arrived to our appointments right on time... Not 20-minutes early like the receptionist asked. I liked the way the office building looked. It was small, quaint. Unlike the huge and commercialized offices I had visited previously.

After completing our paperwork the nurse quickly called me back. I motioned for my husband to follow me back but he shook his head. "You can come," I urged just above a whisper. But he wouldn't.

After doing a series of basic blood pressure and pulse tests she instructed me to change into the clinic scrubs. When she left the room I heard her call my husband in and apologize that she didn't ask us to come in together 'yea, that's what I tried to tell him' I thought.

So there we were. Our doctor, and Indian man, was probably the nicest doctor we've ever had. In fact, normally we don't like to go to the people in white coats, but he changed our perception. But what threw me for a loop was when the doctor asked: "So are you two thinking about starting a family?" and after glancing at my husband, I let him reply, he said: "Yea, probably in the next 1 to 2 years." I gave him the 'what?!--No, wait, we'll talk later' look, and as soon as the doctor left the room we did.

"A year to two years?" I asked.
"I didn't mean to say that," he said defensively. "I meant I wanted to have a kid in hand in like a year or two."
"Well no one thinks in those terms," I shot back.

While I went to get blood work done hubs completed his physical, and when I walked in I overheard them completing a conversation about what's safe before or during pregnancy. 'Now we're talking,' I thought.

We decided to take our Tetanus/ Pertussis shots then as to not have to worry about it later when it's baby makin' time. The doctor gave me good advice... Prenatals, calcium pills, constant exercise, yoga and meditation (?), OB referrals... The whole nine yards. I felt a lot better after going through that process-- Actually talking to a professional and getting my questions out in the open.

I got a phone call the other day about our blood test results. My husband's came in a day before mine and I worried something was wrong--What if I was.. you know. Do they test for that?

The woman on the other end of the line with my results paused before she read my results. Blood sugar--Good. Iron levels--Good. Cholesterol level--Good, and she paused before she read my last result... I was at 106 for my "bad cholesterol" level, the doctor likes me to stay around 100. Diet and exercise better and get checked again in 6-12 months if I'm not pregnant.

I let out a sigh of relief, not because I needed an excuse to lay off the french fries, but because she didn't tell me the news I've been dreading--I've been suspicious about. I have a feeling this is only the beginning of my paranoia.

The Removal

I called the doctor's office of where I'm getting my checkup and asked if they did Mirena removals. They didn't, so I called my "female doctor" right away, knowing it normally takes awhile for me to get in for an appointment. Needless to say I was quite surprised when they asked "How does next Tuesday sound?" It sounded... Soon. I was expecting at least a month, not seven days.

The week went by quickly, my mental countdown was ticking all week, but it wasn't until the day before and morning of that I really began to think of excuses. 24 hours, 10 hours, 2 hours... The closer it got to my appointment time the more I thought of canceling--Especially since it was the same day of Oprah's show on "motherhood" which was making me rethink it all. I was moments away, debating my decision on Twitter when I finally got the courage to just go!

The whole way there I watched for signs to turn around, to cancel. I didn't get lost--That was a good sign. I was almost on time-An OK sign. I found a parking spot--Good sign. But when I went upstairs to my doctor's office, and the lady gave me weird looks about my insurance, I knew that wasn't a good sign.

I am blessed with good insurance. It covers 100% of my health care fees so long as I visit a place that's "in network" (which most places are). So when the woman verifying my insurance told me they didn't cover IUD removals, and that I'd have to pay the $300 I figured that was the sign I was waiting for... A sign that I shouldn't go through with it. She told me today I was in luck, if I did it then I'd get 25% off an only have to pay $200 something. What? To pull a string? No thank-you!

I got up to leave but on my way out (in near tears) I decided to call my insurance myself. Why would they pay for the device and insertion but leave me to live with it the rest of my life?

My gut instinct was right--That lady, and whoever she talked to were wrong. The man on the phone told me I'd only have to pay a $30 copay. I kept him on the phone, marched back into the office of snooty people and handed her my phone. After she and him discussed the matter they came to the conclusion that I'd actually have to pay my $150 deductible. And she made it clear that it needed to be paid up front. Who did she think I was and why was she acting like I couldn't pay my bill? What? Whatever. An hour had passed since my appointment time and after going over the cost with my husband I decided if they could get me in right then, I'd do it, if not, I'd wait, and possibly find a new doctor. The woman told me she could get me in right away so I went ahead and proceeded.

My wait time in the waiting room was seconds, that made me happy. But the time I spent waiting in the patient room was ridiculous. I was in a hurry to undress before the doctor arrived but then waited another half hour (no joke) before she even came in... Then she was in and our in less than 2 minutes... And I/my insurance paid $300 for that? I should be a GYNO!

Since my "operation" (I'm going to call it that because of the cost) I've been a little moody. And I think it's a little ironic that just days after getting it out I decide to change my mind. I haven't been able to diagnose myself yet (I'm a hypochondriac so I do that kinda stuff) but I'm thinking it's a combination of a couple of things: 1. Stress. I try not to stress often, but lately I feel like a ticking time bomb. 2. Pregnant friends. How can I swoon over my best friends' bellies and babies if I have my own? and 3. Hormones, I think that's causing my stress, and hyperactive jealousy. Can I blame my hormones for everything? I think I may try.